Eight years ago it was television that I gave up. Six years ago it was time to give up Facebook. Four years ago I was clearing space for 10 minutes of me time daily...by running.
Giving up TV was a piece of cake, I've never missed having it. Facebook was almost as easy, I only logged in one time by mistake...and that was this past winter. The running was not as easy though, it was a mental shift...and mental challenge. I found that I was not above running in jeans, or Chaco's, or while waiting for a table at The Stagecoach, or inside my house from front door to back door, over and over. I just made it happen. I even made it happen when I had a boot on my foot for 6 weeks from a broken toe. For that one, I'm sure I provided some comic relief around my neighborhood.
I only remember one instance when I thought about giving up...one time, that's all. I had managed to work a full day, tied up the loose ends with work and home and found myself ready for bed at 11:37pm. Any night that I get to bed before midnight is a victory. I followed through my evening ritual of showering and changing into pjs...and I released a sigh as my head hit the pillow. Another day in the books and I would soon be off into a peaceful slumber. But...my peace was quickly disrupted as I thought about my day and realized I had not gone on my run...and the clock was 11:53pm. I rolled my eyes and let out a defeated groan, and cursed the stupid existence of my running routine, and tried talking myself into many excuses, but none prevailed....it wasn't easy and it took everything I had to get back out of bed. But I did and went for that silly 10 minute run at 11:58pm. In my pjs. Ultimately, I just got over it! I was not about to give up the effort that I had put into the prior 300-something days of running.
I made it happen for a year and a half...every day, not a single day missed. I just did it. No harm done. There were days I bitched and complained, laughed and cried, smiled and loved every minute of it. It wasn't about going fast, or slow, or how far..it was about letting go of excuses and getting over the noise. No. Matter. What. Simply making time for me to do something, without interruption.
And I did.
WARNING! Excuse-time:
Then about two years ago things got really busy in life, professionally and personally.
A good kind of busy; a relationship, a family, a studio bursting at the seams, and me going with the busy flow...something I can do really well! And then I blinked my eyes and looked at my calendar...two years had passed and I was worn out. Weekends were spent with competitions girls, weekdays were filled with classes, downtime was non-existant. I knew my neighbor mowed my yard...but I didn't realize it was every week...and planted flowers...every year. And dance families brought me dinner to eat...and the nights they didn't, I would have a one food group meal of chicken, at some crazy hour. And a mom that ran errands for me and did all of my grocery shopping...or all of my shopping for that matter.
That elusive simplicity thing that I had been trying so hard to cultivate, well I had completely lost grasp of it...without knowing or taking a moment to realize how quickly life was passing me by. I needed a break, in a major way.
That was this time last year. That's the funny thing about timing...last year, what? Seems like yesterday.
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